it's always about her
every time we chat on msn, it's always her problems, and frankly i'm sick of it
yes, i love her and i want to help her
but how can i solve her problems when i'm over here?
i can't fix up her relationships with her friends
and there's only so many ways you can say 'that sucks' before it becomes meaningless
and now she's stressing about enrolling for uni, when the enrollment hasn't even opened yet
i'm just sick of hearing about it
but then, i can't really complain, can i?
i'm the one who asks her to open up to me
and when i have problems, she's the one i want to tell
it's probably natural though
talking so much, things are bound to get repetitive and boring
but i feel bad for being pissed of at her
and that kind of brings me back to the point of this blog doesn't it?
i feel bad for feeling things i have every right to feel
and then i hate myself that i feel bad about them
sometimes i think i need a counsellor or something
maybe i'll see one at uni
never know
but then there are so many people who are in shittier places than i am
and i wouldn't even know how to describe how i feel
i almost want something bad to happen to me (not anyone else) so i have a reason to feel like this
and that scares me more than anything
i need someone to open up to
someone who knows everything that i am
someone who can tell me that it's okay to feel like i am
maybe someday?